Oh Captain, My Captain

Well, some things changed today: They killed off Captain America.


1941-2007. Not a bad run for a scrawny Steve Rogers who, after being injected with the 'Super-Soldier Serum' suddenly became the pinnacle of human potential. His first comic showed him decking Hitler on the cover (see left).

He was by far my favorite superhero with wings on his head. Well, actually he was one of my favorite superheros of any of them. Even though he didn't 'technically' have any super powers, I think living for 66 years at the peak of physical condition, getting trapped and frozen in the ocean after WWII, surviving in suspended animation until being revived decades later still feeling great what with his sweet-A shield and kung-fu grip constitutes something 'super' going on.

I never owned any of the Cap's comics, but I remember the show on TV. He had one heckuva cool motorcycle, and I've already mentioned the wings. Dunno why I liked him so much, to be honest, but I did.

This whole killing of the Captain thing reminds me of a Vonnegut quote:

This was the reason Americans shot each other so often: It was a convenient literary device for ending short stories and books.

I might add that it's also a convenient literary device for drumming up sales of a lagging product. Of course, in comics, you can never be sure anybody will stay dead (what major character has?), so I'm not sure how long it will take to bring him back (wanna start a pool?), but I guess their marketing ploy worked because this is now front page news and I'm paying more attention to Cap than I have in years.

Read more here. or here. or here.

Next thing you know Spider-Man will reveal to the world that he's really Peter Parker...

Tim "still in denial" James

The Indestructible Man

I Just heard today about Rulon Gardner surviving another accident.

Who-lon?? Gard-what?? You may be saying.

You know, Rulon Gardner... your friendly neighborhood heavyweight champion of the world.

The one who impaled himself on an arrow in grade school.

The one who beat the Legendary Alexander Karelin in Sydney 2000.

The one who lost a toe due to frostbite after crashing his snowmobile in 2002.

The one who pretty much walked away from a motorcycle crash in 2004.

The one who gets a trophy:



I had the chance to meet this guy back in my days at Nebraska and I can honestly say he's a class act. I'm glad he's okay after all his mishaps, but I can hear Mark and Tolly razzing him but good for this latest in the string of improbable, larger-than-life experiences by the man, the myth, the legend: The Rulon.

Tim "amazed" James

MBTA + ATHF = LOL

Checking the current Department of Homeland Security threat level reveals that we are (still) under significant risk of terrorist attacks, translating to an 'Elevated' or 'Yellow' threat level.

Checking This Site reveals that Aqua Teen Hunger Force somehow got the green light for a movie to be released later this year.

Checking eBay for listings of 'Mooninites' reveals a strange connection between the Mooninites, Boston, and January 31, 2007.

Checking this Wikipedia Entry reveals an ever-changing landscape of majority-rules input/opinions/links/background/etc. into what in the Sam Hill I'm getting at here.

Checking this Press Conference Video reveals that hairstyles of the '70s are important for some, while not so much so to others.

Checking the Cartoon Network Adult Swim website reveals lawyers are getting very excited about the goings-on.

What could be better than a nice little marketing scheme gone horribly awry? Perhaps a marketing scheme going so well that it exceeds everyone's dreams of what was possible. We'll soon find out if it really is easier to get forgiveness than permisson. Well, okay, "soon" maybe isn't the most appropriate word.

Tim "the moon rules" James

Take On the World!!

Well, they've done it. Garmin is doing a Super Bowl commercial this year.

Starring Maposaurus (right) and Garmin Man, this is a sure-fire winner, folks, let me tell you what.

Godzilla versus Power Rangers accompanied by Heavy Metal. What could be better?

I'm reserving my harshest judgement for this thing till after it airs on the 4th, but I must admit to taking some pretty high readings on my lame-o-meter after first watching.

But the dang song is somewhat stuck in my head (along with the 'Funk Soul Brother' that is Fatboy Slim's latest hit... most lyrically complex song ever. That's true poetry, no?) so perhaps there is something to this approach that I just can't appreciate due to being too close to the action. (Not to mention overly judgemental).

So let me know what you think... is this a success or not? Make your predictions now, and we'll find out halfway through the second quarter of the Bears/Colts game.

Tim "new highway" James

Safe at Any Speed

So I'm now on one week with a new roommate. It's going quite well, and it's kinda nice to have somebody besides my microwave to chat to of an evening. (As the canopener won't return my calls) . But the poor guy moved in during a freezing-rain storm. Not the best of weather conditions for that kinda thing. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, all over the map.

So rather than help the guy dig his car out of the ice-block that it turned into, I loaned him my ice-scraper. Later that night I asked him what he did with the thing once he was finished. "It's on the top of your car"

"Cool, thanks."

Next day, leaving from work for lunch I suddenly remember... Dang it!!! Now I've gotta go and find myself a new scraper, but before getting too choked up over my loss I decide to look on top of the car 'just in case'. Well, what do you know, there it was. Perched somewhat precariously, but looking no worse for the wear, right on top of the car.

I must be the world's lamest driver. Ever.

This week is also of note in that it marks The Scott Phillips foray into the blogosphere. Yay for new additions!! Looking good, Scott-Tissue. Yes, have some! Something to do with... Are you ready for some... Whatever, man, just don't call me about your stinkin' Six Sigma Database, got it!! But please don't stop leaving comments here once you become all famous and everything with what you're gonna do there. You know, remember us little people.

All for now,
Tim "peppercorn ranch" James

Hot Dang!

Just read this little bit of news from our friends across the pond. Now that's something I can wrap my teeth around! Even if they don't know how to spell (see 'tumour' or 'chillies') I can overlook such things in order to hear that eating spicy food could potentially kill cancer. I was skeptical at first, but if Oprah's site even says it, it's gotta be true, no?

What I wonder is if this isn't just the 'normal' action of capsaicin... isn't the death of cells what one feels after ingesting a nice, plump, spicy as all-get-out habanero pepper? Is it any surprise that cancer has difficulty standing up to such an onslaught? I also wonder about their 'no side effects' take on enjoying the spice... but I won't go into that.

Now I'm even more thankful for all those dares I took, all those bottles of hot sauce I've drank, all those peppers I've eaten, all those lasagnas I've made, and all those spices I've imbibed over the years. Well, perhaps 'thankful' isn't the right word. Perhaps I'm thinking more along the lines of "Ha! See! I wasn't stupid after all!"

Tim "Jamacia Me Crazy" James

We All Fall Down

I just gotta wonder what went down last Thursday at Kennesaw State University (Check out the video if you've got the time).

I don't know if I buy that official story about 'adhesive failure' or 'water damage', but whatever happened, there was a sudden disturbance in the irony-sphere to be sure. (The poor University doesn't even have a good picture of the completed statue to show for it.)

I'll have to brush-up on my gremlin-speak, head myself out to Georgia, quiz the locals, and get back to y'all with the news.

Tim "fed after midnight" James

Old Man Tim(e)

It started simply enough... an attempt to cop-out of actually doing a blog entry, but instead do a sort of "Year in Review" type thing where I just reminisce about this past year to which we will soon bid farewell.

Trouble is, I can't seem to remember much from this year, but here's my list of stuff worth noting in 2006 that I came up with in like 20 minutes or so:

1. Pearl Jam releases self-titled album (love it or hate it, I took my pick)
   
2. Turning 30 didn't end the universe as we know it (or did it?)
   
3. 'Stranger Than Fiction' made me smile even more than 'Little Miss Sunshine' did
   
4. John and Kim got all hitched-up (Yay for pinecones... but what about #2?)
   
5. Against all odds, I somehow managed to upgrade my car situation (rethinking #2)
   
6. Say hello to our little friends: Eva, Lily & Noah
   (Where's the link, Grossardts?)
7. Okie State beats Nebraska... at football, and wins a bowl game (seriously... #2??)
   
8. Barrett, Crippin, Heather, Jerry, Kim, Lucas & Amber, and Spring show me the ways of the blogosphere
9. I laughed myself silly watching the end of the Bears vs. Cardinals Monday Night Football game
10. You actually read this (Lame-O-Meter Threat Level: Orange)

Feel free to add your own tidbits of trivia, experiences of exhilaration, moments of memorabilia, stories of success, details of despair, remarks to remember, or appalling abuses of alliteration from 2006.

See ya next year,

Tim "Donkey Kong Jr." James

A Cup of Good Cheer

'Twas the week before Christmas and time for a blog,
But I'd thought of nothing, my mind was a fog.

I am looking forward to Christmas vacation,
as home with the family is my destination.

But before I can get there there's things left to do
like rearrange woodblocks and play my kazoo.

The house is all piled up with laundry and bills;
coupon upon coupon promising great deals.

So much going on, what with shopping and work
and trying to drive without being a jerk.

Not the best 'something' in which to create,
so I opted instead to procrastinate.

But time has a way of still marching along
despite my best efforts to shorten its song.

So here I sit now just a few days away
from the time of the year that we give things away.

But 'The Perfect Gift' is oft hard to find
Is it more 'in the Spirit' to be just and kind?

"The thought is what counts!" that's my Christmas cry,
the problem is most times it just doesn't fly.

There's friends to remember and strangers in need.
To fill all the stockings: well... daunting indeed.

"Peace on Earth" to happen, must begin somewhere.
Could it be just as simple as showing you care?

Here I am now rambling on in this post
and still haven't said what I wanted to most.

Try to think back to a friend or a toy
or a part of your life that has given you Joy.

Pause for a moment, and stop to consider
how big of a treasure it is to remember.

These times that we're given; hold onto them tight
for someday they'll help in the darkness of night.

We're all on this journey, single threads in a rope,
specs of dust all, but yet able to hope.

So share when you're able, and ask when in need.
For nothing unites like a heartfelt good deed.

And while in the 'real world' of daily routine,
you're filling your place in a greater machine.

By touching one life, when given a chance,
you're playing your part in this life's grand dance.

All is not perfect, I'm first to admit,
But you make a difference with each little bit.

Now down off my soapbox I'll take a quick step
I guess this no longer inside could be kept.

With these few typed words, I've now met my goal
Of making an entry not leaving a hole.

This one last warning the author admits:
I don't do a good job of giving out gifts.

So if I get you nothing, don't take it as bad.
It's just that I'm lazy and not that I'm mad.

Tim "person of the year" James

Having Solved All Other Problems...

I was wanting to rant about Dr. James Dobson's take on the new movie 'Happy Feet' that I overheard on the radio (around 17:40 - 21:00 in the broadcast) this week over lunch (I tuned in with the express intent of getting frustrated... mission accomplished)


Apparently the fact that a little penguin is an outcast and different than the other penguins, doesn't fit in, and tells his dad he needs to be accepted for who he is means that 'Happy Feet' is promoting the 'homosexual agenda'... thus obviously bringing on the age of the Apocalypse. 'Happy Feet' for crying out loud. And then, the Focus on the Family movie review is for the most part positive:

"Gratifyingly... the film doesn't appear to boast any banner other than, 'Friendship and love can overcome any difference.'"

But I won't rant about that, ranting is no good for the soul. Chicken soup, however...

Tim "I don't understand this world in which I live" James